My thoughts on the Connecticut tragedy

Over the last few days I have cried so many tears for those children, staff, families and friends for those who have passed on and for those who have lost their loved ones.  I can't even imagine how they are feeling especially when we are so close to celebrating Christmas which should be a happy time for all of us.  I have been so affected by this latest tragedy, and I know that many people say the shooter had a mental illness, but to me it doesn't matter.  The fact is he killed SO many innocent, beautiful children who were between the ages of 5-7 years old and were just starting their lives.  This has torn me up to pieces, and I'm not even a parent.  However, I am an early childhood educator sub and I have also been looking after children for a VERY long time.  I so badly want to hold all of my babies that I look after extra tight and I can't wait to do so next time I see them.  I can't even begin to imagine how the parents are feeling losing their children right before Christmas, not being able to open presents with them.

I hope those children who did survive will get the help and support that they need to cope through this properly.  I fear that many of them will have PTSD for the rest of their lives I so wish I could take it for them.  They should not have to suffer.

I don't even know how the teachers, staff, parents, and children will be able to step back into the school knowing that this has happened.  I mean what do you do in that situation? You can't build a new school can you? Do they relocate? Some of those children lost their friends, siblings and teachers.  I've tried to vision myself in their situation as to how they will feel, and I cannot comprehend it.  I don't think I would be able to live with myself knowing that one of my best friends died in a school that I have to continue going to, to learn.  It just makes me so sad.

I'm sure many of you have seen the pictures of the children and staff who lost their lives.  They were all beautiful people, you can tell just by looking at their faces.  My heart aches so much, that I am just completely overwhelmed.

This tragedy has shocked many of us all around the world, and even though many of us are sad, angry, frustrated, and keep asking ourselves the questions as to why...We need to pray that those who have been left behind will get the support and necessary counseling they need to hopefully be able to move on and I hope the parents will sit their children down and answer any questions they may have as to why this has happened.  They need to know and understand that this was not their fault, and that sometimes in life things happen and we don't always know why, or what the reason was but that they will do everything in their power to help them cope  Even for those children who did not attend the school and may have heard the news, I still think the parents should have this conversation with them, because we don't want to create more fear for them.  School should be a place where they feel safe, and to learn.

Over the weekend my mother-in-law and I were talking about this, and I was telling her how upset I was and she said something to me that surprised me and actually made me feel a lot better.  She reminded me that my dad who passed away 4 years ago and I was very closed to will do everything in his power to hug each child and protect them, just like he did while he was here with us.  I said to her, you are absolutely right and I never thought of it that way.  It made me feel better knowing that even though I may not have him here, at least he will do whatever he can in Heaven.